wiselilraccoon
Jr. Member
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Posts: 50
...static electicity and pudding...
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« on: January 07, 2008, 02:52:25 PM » |
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The Memory of Snow
The souls of women float just above the ground
as if walking on the memory of snow.
Ready to be air if struck, water if kicked,
stone if belittled, fire if ignored.
The souls of women laugh lightly in most moments,
beaming pinpoints through the skin. It makes you
want to touch. Priestesses and party dresses.
And so you touch. Shocked to find flesh, you
notice a bad memory. Soon each woman is the
same woman and her soul is bitter lamplight,
bitter, insatiable lamplight.
The souls of women reel and swoon with
art and moon and business meetings. They
encircle bitter sisters and float just above the ground
as if walking on the memory of snow.
–Wren Tuatha
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countrygrl
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« Reply #1 on: January 07, 2008, 06:17:44 PM » |
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You had me from the opening two lines. It somehow reminded me of the title, Snow Falling on Cedars, that lyrically written book. And you come full circle. Welcome to PIB, Wren. Won't you introduce yourself, tell us a little more about yourself?
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theirishsea
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« Reply #2 on: January 07, 2008, 07:44:16 PM » |
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Tghis has a lot of mystery about it----at least for me. It is an interesting poem. I like the voice and the play with language & imagery, the 4 elements especially and the repetition of the bitter lamplight.
My rational mind hasn't grasped the meaning of the whole poem, but I do feel that this is original and the images are exciting, especially that lamplight.
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wiselilraccoon
Jr. Member
Karma: 0
Posts: 50
...static electicity and pudding...
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« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2008, 07:51:12 PM » |
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Thanks to both of you. I did just post something in the "Introduce Yourself" forum. I'm enjoying connecting with local poets on this site. Thanks for noticing the 4 elements. I often stick them in but wonder if that isn't too cultural for some to appreciate.
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constantine
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« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2008, 08:29:22 PM » |
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beautifully done. nice to hear a new voice, especially one so eloquent. welcome.
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Slazinger
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« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2008, 12:17:44 AM » |
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I love the visual image of "float just above the ground
as if walking on the memory of snow", welcome.
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Real art is always a gift.
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saw
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« Reply #6 on: January 08, 2008, 10:08:22 AM » |
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beautiful, mysterious concepts...highly original....welcome aboard........
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moe, larry, cheese....no, Limburger !
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BardmasterUB05
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« Reply #7 on: January 08, 2008, 10:17:54 AM » |
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Marvelous open stanza, wiswlilracoon, and it steadily keeps up the pace. Delightful first post. Welcome to PIB.
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